I won second place! Fifty bucks!

And they called my story surrealistic. I pretty much died.

Everything is located here, I think: http://www.theshinejournal.com/contestwinners.htm

Note that they formatted my story all weird. Oh well. I still earned fifty bucks with writing, something that, for once, will actually make me proud to spend money.

P.S. I'm back from Israel, but refuse to see anyone because I didn't have time for any homework whatsoever. So, yeah. I'll talk about the trip at school, and believe me, there are many amusing stories to tell.

P.P.S. Not getting a facebook after all. My mother overestimated how persistent my cousins would be... so that's one less distraction from homework.

Hallo!

For those of you who are a) already bored or b) saddled with pointless homework, here is a short version:
* Facebook? FUCK
* 8 hours next to drunk people
* Germany is lose unless in mile-high altitudes
* I have found my own leetle corner of gay!

( This will make things somewhat clearer )

I had to. If only Max was here to see this. 

 

YES.

THIS YEAR, THERE IS LITTLE MARGIN FOR ERROR.

YOU ARE ONLY ALLOWED TO HANG OUT ON A SCHOOL NIGHT ONCE, MAYBE TWICE A WEEK.

THE END.

Also: GO TO TUTORIAL.

Help with enforcement needed, plz. (My brain favors a weak executive).

I am recording this event because it seems like one of those things I may forget for no good reason, and wouldn't that just be sad?

So, in case my braincells get shot (like him, poor thing), here are the details:

First, Monica, Meghna and I sat in line with our schoolwork strewn about us; Danielle, now possibly demoted from Hamster position, joined later. We were part of the "lucky first 20," as the stern lady with the curly grey hair put it. We stood in line and stared at book titles until we finally came to Mr. Pratchett, and I was disappointed to find that due to evil rules he would not, in fact, sign my French homework. We said the one glove he was wearing is cool and asked him why he didn't have another, and he looked at us strangely and said we'd soon find out.

Later, he gave a very amusing talk which provided some interesting insight on what it's like to be book touring and, indeed, what it's like to be a (succesful) author. He seemed a bit tired, but hey -- I would be too, and I am strokeless and many decades younger.

There was a question and answer part, which I found funny because I thought of a question to ask while bored, having been completely unaware that I would actually get the chance to ask it! So, he pointed to me and said "you with the headband thing" (it took me about five seconds to process what this meant). I asked him if he is more like Aziraphale or Crowley. After about four seconds of him staring at me blankly, the crowd burst out laughing. Ha, he could not evade my question! Well, he kind of did, but his response was hilarious anyway -- he talked about how Neil Gaiman does not wear anything but black, ever. So I loosely interpreted that yes, Terry Pratchett is an Aziraphale. Yay.

When I saw Shaina (with Lincoln) in the back, I told her I would've asked if he thought they made a good couple if I knew she was there. And I would've.

At Barone, Lincoln phailed at eating his sausage monstrosity, and Danielle went classy with her goat cheese platter.

I thought to myself, "Golly, what a good day this is!" and then I saw my homework and swore loudly.

But tomorrow is Youth & Government. (:

I didn't think you could procrastinate when you were this close to being done. But no, oh no.

Frenchmen: *smoke/fuck/drink/all of the above* oh wait, people are le colonizing. HAY GUYS, LET'S GO DO THAT.
Louis XIV: What? Will there be ballet?

New France, in which there is Not Ballet: I am freezing. I only attract crazy people.
Crazy People Fur-trappers: Hey look a beav -- WHERE IS ZE ALCOHOL? I NEED ALCOHOL IN ORDER TO GIVE THINGS SUSPICIOUS NAMES.
Des Moines: Some Monks? What the hell?
Grand Teton: Dude, shut up. I'm Big Breast.

English Colonists: Fucking trappers are up in our Ohio.
French Colonists: Fucking Brits are up in our Oh-ee-oh.
English Colonists: Okay, that's it.

- War Ensues -

Europe: *art/culture* I say, all those things we sent to America are fighting. Maybe we should... do something.

- The Europeans Do Stuff -

Braddock: I have a small penis. Let's get some BIG GUNS. Hey wait, better idea! Let's spread our troops as THINLY AS POSSIBLE. IT'S BRILLIANT.
George Bush: *taking notes*
William Pitt: Um, you're old k? Let's attack Quebec.
Colonists: WTF, you want me to give troops for my own war? Stop trading with the enemy? Hell to the no, I am selling my fucking tobacco.

- Somehow, Brits Win -

Great Britian: So much ownage, so little time.
France: Fuck you. We will make art films and infinitely more attractive babies.
Germany: No one seems to have noticed that we have a superhuman militia. *shifty* excellent... excellent...
Spain: Where did all our goldz go? )':

Brits: HOKAY AMERICUNZ, YOU BASICALLY ARE BELONG TO US.
Colonists: That war was us! All us!
Brits: But you people live in the toilet of civilization.
Colonists: Hear that? That's the man, the man opressing us!
The Revolution: *in the green room* Civvy dahling, can you check my props?
The Civil War: Oh, sure. I still have a while.

Fin End.

Well, one of them, anyway.

And here it is. 

Wow, I should be talking about the new year blah blah life changes blah but guess what, James McAvoy Becoming Jane > School.

Unless the homecoming theme will indeed be Harry Potter, in which case School slightly > Becoming Jane, but not James McAvoy. 

Watch me bathe in my shallowness. (Is that contradictory? I think it is.) 

Also: P.S. I updated  anditsleeps *hintage*

So, I'm almost done with my APUSH textbook notes, and I'm glad to find that I'm actually interested because otherwise I would've committed suicide by now. Nontheless, notes such as:

* @ eve of revolution: many leading Anglicans supported king (where they got money); cuz of previous point, serious talk of American bishopric, but non-Anglicans were like “WTF GUYS, tightening of royal reins!” 

have managed to work their way into my computer. 

Um.

Jesus Christ, I hope no one checks these thoroughly.

Adk;kjsidj!!!11